Whats the Problem? Who me, apostate?

Are people your problem? No. Is God your problem? No! YOU are your problem, and specifically, your expectation is your downfall. Sure, expect great things of God - but qualify what you mean by great. Don't think great things means likeable things, pleasant things, easy things. I tell you plainly that you can expect the opposite. Since you and I were born with an Adamic nature which makes us inherently selfish, stubborn, and greedy, it behooves God to lead us along a path that of self-denial, foregoing what we "like" in favor of conformity to the image of His Son, who is anything but self-ish.
So when we look at Job we see that he was righteous, but he was ignorant. All he knew was blessing, prosperity, and living in the "hedge." Yes, it's lovely to live there in the hedge. Everything he touched was blessed; he was protected from failure. Did Job worship God as a result? You bet! And like most, thought that the blessing was a result of his own righteousness and servitude. But Satan pointed out that that the hedge of blessing and protection was the very thing that kept Job so faithful.
Therefore the testing of Job was a valid test, a crucial one, and a crucible through which each Christian will be purged, sifted, and tried. To what end? It is summed up in the words of Job himself as he neared the end of his ordeal: "I have heard Thee by the hearing of the ear: but now my eye seeth Thee." BUT NOW! BUT NOW! BUT NOW! Before he heard about Him, but now he sees Him, and falls to the ground. Before he worshipped Him having heard, now he worships having seen, and known. I submit that God set him up for such experiential knowledge by allowing him to be subjected to the assaults of the devil, the harshness of his environment, the misunderstanding of his friends, the loss of his family and material possessions, and his physical infirmity. I submit that if anyone desires to take up the cross and follow Christ such testing is the only realistic expectation His disciple can entertain.
Many quickly point out that Job was blessed more in the end than in the beginning; but if getting doubly blessed is our purpose for enduring such affliction then we have failed the very purpose of such a test, and such an attitude only proves man's capacity for being self-serving, even in the worst of circumstances.
I am writing to you, O Christian, who is so full of expectation of what the spiritual life should be like, you who are so sure that you know God, so acquainted you are with His Word! Have you seen God? Or are you worshipping what you have heard, bowing to an invisible force in the clouds, expecting some blessing or feeling or voice or gift? Where will you be, when there is no "Blessed Assurance", when all the evidence points to your failure as a Christian, when "peace like a river" is no longer "attending" your way?
I am writing to that individual who is on the slippery slope of apostasy, ready to renounce their faith (not openly of course, but inwardly) because of some unrealized dream or hope or wish or expectation that after ALL you've been through, surely God will bless you or compensate you or reward you or answer you! Beware! It is more likely that God wishes to know if you worship Him for His gifts, or for Himself; and of course you know that HE knows, it is YOU that must know. The Lord knew, and Peter thought he knew, but by cock's crow Peter knew he didn't know, and we know he didn't know either. Some of you think you know, but you don't know, not yet. Perhaps you need a lion's den to be brought face to face with God. Perhaps a flaming furnace to encounter the Fourth Man. Perhaps you need a cross of splintery wood instead of shiny gold electroplate.
How easy and grandiose it is to speak of martyrdom and dying for Christ. But anyone can DIE for Him: how many will LIVE for Him? The test is not in the dying, but in the living; not in one ultimate act of sacrifice, but in a million little obediences every day! Yes! If you cannot, if you will not, take up the cross and die in the mundane and hum-drum of Today, in the HERE and NOW, you are not fit to die the martyr's death in the unknown darkness of some future persecution.
People do not turn away from their faith and become apostate when threatened with death. They fall away when they become bitter against people, angry with God, and offended with His manner of dealing with them. It isn't a sudden decision you are confronted with, but an invisible thing which starts from the core of your being and works its way into your soul. It is certainly a clear and present danger, and it is within you now, maybe in an inert, embryonic form, maybe in a full-blown disillusionment and anger against God, but it is THERE, waiting for you to succumb to it, feeding itself on your expectation.
Let us draw near to God, and ask to be reduced to Christ. Let us accept whatever He deems beneficial to us, whether it is according to our expectation or not. Know that by the time the rooster crows you may curse and swear that you don't know the Man. Blessed is the one who finds no occasion for stumbling in Him. Love people, but expect nothing from them. Enjoy God, love Him, obey Him: be content with that. ~C. Brogden